A Bit of a Wallow

To be honest, I am feeling rather low today. A bit sorry for myself. The excitement of yesterday’s new dressing, the anticipation of how my wrist was healing has given way to the sombre reality that it’s still weeks before I can start to use my hand properly again. Suddenly that feels daunting. Weeks of one handed washing up; weeks of struggling to push the vacuum cleaner round; in short, weeks where hitherto simple tasks to which I generally do not give much thought, are effortful and time consuming challenges. So I am allowing myself a little wallow this morning. A few what if thoughts that I have so far banished. I guess this moment and those thoughts were inevitable. By this afternoon, I hope to have reconciled myself with this reality, and found new interim goals to enjoy and aim for, and to be grateful for what I have. Patience is not one of my strongest suits. It is something I had to learn as a teacher, and in a professional capacity I became very good. Now my body needs a bit of that patience and understanding, and some of the motivational skills I used to effect with my pupils.
So onwards and upwards. I shall do my physio exercises, plan enjoyable tasks into my days, accept that I tire quite quickly, and try to remember that each hour brings me closer to a healed wrist. These weeks may seem long now, but they’ll soon be over. In the meantime, I am lucky to have the support of friends, I am able to work, MasterB remains a joy and a delight, and spring is here. I have managed to use my little Olympus camera and I have started to read a novel by Rose Tremain. Other Nephew may dewinterise das Boot, clean off the worst of her winter dirt and get some enjoyment afloat. And by the time summer is here I should be out and about, a two handed person once more.
I feel better already.

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13 thoughts on “A Bit of a Wallow

  1. I think allowing yourself a wallow is fine and I see by the end of your post that your mood is on the upswing! I had no doubt that your determined positive self would be looking forward to summer, clicking your camera and enjoying being out in the Spring air! MasterB will maybe help with physio.. 😛 Speaking of MasterB, it was a delight to turn the calendar to April and see his stand up happy tail! Great news that Other Nephew is going to tend to das Boot!!!

    • Grey skies due to the Saharan dust helps me cope with not taking photos, and physio has to be attempted when MasterB is asleep or out. I really don’t want him helping! When I removed my cast to do my exercises I felt quite scared, and very glad to put it back on again. Being without it made me feel very vulnerable. So I think that may help me to be patient.
      I am glad you are enjoying the calendar. He’s a great boy.

  2. As my mother would say ‘you are suffering a bit of reaction’. A high is often followed by a low. Just accept it & it will pass. So glad you are able to use your camera because we your audience don’t want to be without your wonderful views of life (& Master B of course!)

    • Thanks Julia. I believe you are right. It may not help that I am updating my will…
      As to the photos, I haven’t looked at thm yet, and they may just be a blur, but practice makes perfect.

  3. I think it’s completely normal to wallow some. It’s not an easy thing to live with. Take it one day at a time, or one hour. Best wishes

    • I have been working,y way through a list of things that need doing so I can feel a sense of achievement at the end of the day. Also when Octavia popped round with my ironing she looked at my arm and was very upbeat. I think that helps.

  4. I like the way the blog describes the transformation of your mood. Perfectly natural for a band of low pressure to hit but I’m pleased it didn’t take long to lift. A sound sleep and a bright new morning will make all the difference 🙂

    • Writing it down put it in perspective whereas telling myself to snap out of it hadn’t. I spent the day working through a fairly dull list of chores and was in bed by ten. It would have been earlier but his nibs needed outdoor time. Today is a new day and the sun is out. I am still in my pyjamas, working up to a hair wash.

  5. Not surprised – you were very tired on Thursday evening. Not sure we should have dragged you off to Islington. Just going to the hospital and all that entailed was enough for one day. If you’re reading this now and there’s anything I can help with just tell me – otherwise I’ll ring in a bit. I’ve just skyped Sally who sends her love. She’s looking very well – already tanned from the Greek spring sun. And Yorgos so far behaving himself and appreciating how lucky he is in he rather than criticising. x Celia

    >

    • Good morning Celia. Yes, I was very tired, but so glad I went. It caught up with me yesterday though. I need to bath and wash my hair shortly, but it would be lovely to speak to you or see you later. Send my love to Sally when you speak next.

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