Of Drizzle, Neglectfulness, Mints for Police Horses, and Happy Endings

I gather I have been neglectful of MasterB’s public.



I hope that feels better.
I’ve been neglectful about quite a few other things too. The inbox for my email account has an alarming number of unread messages. I have been mainly absent from twitter too. That does not mean, however, that I have been lying on the sofa watching black and white movies on afternoon television while the rain drizzled down outside.
No indeedy. I have been out in that drizzle. Pacing the streets of London; weighing the merits of various compact cameras and narrowing them down to a shortlist of two; indulging my new habit of feeding Polo mints to police horses. Try it. It improves your day. A word of warning though. You must be even handed. If there are two police horses it must be a mint each. Otherwise, and I quote a member of the Met, “All hell will break loose.” I cannot help feeling this is a slight flaw in the efficiency of horses in the enforcement of law and order. Just don’t tell the anarchists.
I have also been to Fracture Clinic. It started well when I was not sent off for an x-ray. Instead I waited with the other fractured folk while the small team of relentlessly cheerful and hardworking staff worked through the lists. Watching the receptionist dealing with a man who had not made an appointment but somehow expected to be seen, reminded me that the patient is not always the one needing sympathy.
Anyway, break out the champagne and get this: the pin that worried them in case it was nudging the bone is innocent. So no need for more surgery. Yippee.
I had a question for the consultant, who once again pointed out what a bad break it was and looked admiringly at the x-rays on file.
What, I wanted to know, would happen if I broke my wrist again. Still high on my lovely x-rays, the consultant said, “Don’t!” and smiled as though he had just made a joke. I looked at him sternly. This is a serious question, I said. He looked contrite. If I fall from my bike again, I imagine that I shall again put my arm out to save myself. What might the consequences be?
“With that amount of metal inside it, your wrist is not going to break in the same place. The problem would be if you broke your arm in another place.”
So basically, I got permission to get on my bike again. As I had been wondering seriously about putting away my cycle clips, and cancelling my application to join the CTC, tearing out the page in my notebook where I have made notes about the cost and colours of various cycle helmets, this was like one of those films where they suddenly do that scratchy bit, and the sad moralistic ending is transformed into one where people skip over impossibly green fields under radiant blue skies while smiling bunny rabbits watch benignly from behind the daisies, and birds trill musically from majestic oaks.
I walked around the hospital with a happy smile on my face. Just as well, as I was in search of the department from which I could apply for a CD of my x-rays. Watch out for it, I am expecting it to go viral. I was sent to three very helpful departments with smiley staff who directed me elsewhere. I was starting to feel I was involved in some strange game to which I did not know the rules, like the one played by teachers who would send pupils off to ask for a long weight from the metalwork department. The office of Governance and Information became my goal. However, they had moved last week and no one was quite sure where they had gone. I reached a corridor where they were rumoured to be. No sign. I stopped a member of staff, who looked around as perplexed as I was. She took me into her department. The staff there, strangely underworked considering how most of the NHS is at full stretch, leapt to the challenge. Or rather two of them did. One scanning a computer screen, the other checking out an internal phone book. The third, who seemed to think I was on my way to a job interview, made defensively depressed comments about the NHS. I love the NHS, I said. She hastened to tell me she did too. The other two redoubled their efforts. One came with me, and after a further five minutes we found the vanished office. We parted with smiles and promises to keep in touch. Actually I made that last bit up. But I did feel I had made a new friend. Then I turned to tell the person in the office why I was there. No smiling. Shocked that I had trespassed uninvited into this sanctum she directed me to a windowless room and gave me a form to complete. As my photo ID did not include my date of birth, I have to send them a copy of my driving licence or my passport, but it was tortuous conversation where she seemed programmed to avoid answering questions. It wasn’t hard to see why she and her co-workers were tucked away from the public. I certainly shan’t be back there headhunting helpful staff when I set up my business.


14 thoughts on “Of Drizzle, Neglectfulness, Mints for Police Horses, and Happy Endings

  1. Hurrah for you v. the pin. Of course it is all about the surgeon’s skill so they must do a check. If it were to be in a bad place that would show badly on him. (Assume a male).

    Hurrah for you and the bicycle. I have also had the “it won’t break there again” not so reassuring speech from the professionals. In my case, I have resolved to never run or rush for any form of transit again. This was not the first time coming to grief when trying to catch a ride. Life is short enough. But I am happy you will again get on the cycle.

    • The consultant who did the op was male and so was the consultant I saw yesterday. Both however were approachable and listened. There has been considerable work in the NHS to get medics and paramedics to see patients as people, and it has worked in all the professionals I have met on this reluctant journey. I think that is why the attitude of the staff in Governance and information jarred so.
      When I get my x-rays, I may share them, so you will be able to judge for yourself the before and after.
      I shan’t be back on the bike straight away. I want that CTC insurance, a new helmet and to get my bike checked over first. Also, the angle my wrist would have to be at on the handlebars would, at present, be very uncomfortable.

      • I admit to being curious about your pins v. mine but I only have the “before” x-rays, not the after. Post-traumatic Stress is a real thing – I look closely at every step I take up or down and avoid the flight of stairs where it happened – no need to rush getting “back into the saddle” with the bicycle.

        I think of orthopedists as being proud of their handicraft and happy to show it off to you. Didn’t mean to suggest that the men would be dismissive, just that they are prevalent. The surgeon was the only male among the medicos I’ve dealt with.

  2. Sounds like they need some new signage. You did well (or not) you wouldn’t make it through the doors of my building at work! Glad you’re all healed up, did you choose a new camera?

    • Well you know what it’s like in hospitals, apart from wards and theatres, most areas have to be accessible to the public and I wasn’t going anywhere that needed a swipe card.
      I am down to two cameras. One is a Lumix, the other an Olympus. The Lumix is lighter and cheaper, but the Olympus has an amazing macro facility. Both are waterproof and tough. I want one I can sling in my bag and use whatever the weather, so I am happy to sacrifice the zoom qualities.

      • My friend is on her second Lumix and its great. Don’t know anything about Olympus but I expect its equal and a good macro is useful. At the end of the day what feels good in your hands will be best for you.

  3. OMC So sowwy deys wus wude tu yous. So is da way of many a business these days tho’. glad yous gunna be okay.

    Luv and Hugs and Kitty Kisses ♥♥♥


  4. Bravo on the pin Isobel…that’s a relief…also good that you’re able to return to cycling (when you’re ready anyway). Sounds like you’re just about ready to get a new camera – all the better to keep up with supplying MasterB’s fans with new photos!


    • I am rather nervous about returning to cycling, but at least it is an option now and the fear of breaking my wrist again has receded.
      Maybe a new camera in a month or so. Could be sooner though… I find the budget or what I want has increased. Maybe I should wait until Christmas and the ones I like now will be yesterday’s models and cheaper!

  5. Great news that there will be no more surgery. Also happy to hear you have narrowed down your choice on a new camera. I think it would be very interesting to see your x-rays if you decide to share them. I flipped MasterB’s calendar to June yesterday.. 🙂

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